


Don't Say You Miss Me

by backslashdelta



Category: Glee
Genre: 6x01, Angst, Canon Compliant, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Post-Break Up, Reaction, Season 6 Breakup
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-21
Updated: 2021-01-21
Packaged: 2021-03-12 14:47:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28887072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/backslashdelta/pseuds/backslashdelta
Summary: Kurt doesn't plan to end things with Blaine, but once the words have left his mouth, there's no taking them back.The immediate aftermath of the 6x01 Klaine breakup.
Relationships: Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel
Comments: 14
Kudos: 30





	Don't Say You Miss Me

**Author's Note:**

> I saw a [sad Klaine post on Tumblr](https://anderhummel.tumblr.com/post/640254517378744320/okay-so-let-me-get-this-straight-first) and was inspired to write this. Ended up writing the whole thing while I was supposed to be working, oops.

Kurt watches as Blaine storms out of the restaurant, the silence left in his wake deafening.

He hadn't meant for this to be a breakup. He loved Blaine, and he _still_ loves Blaine, things have just been so _hard_ lately, and he's been feeling all this pressure about the wedding, and… and he's just not ready.

He knows it's not all on Blaine, it's on him, too. He should have _talked_ to his fiancé – or, rather, _ex_ -fiancé – about how he was feeling. Blaine would have understood. Blaine always understood. But Kurt doesn't know _how_ to talk to people, he didn't _want_ to push Blaine away, but he couldn't stop himself.

And now they're _this_. Now they're nothing. Just like that, over, and Blaine will never forgive him.

* * *

The rain pours from the sky, soaking through his clothes and plastering his thick curls to his head, but he barely notices the chill seeping into his bones, barely notices anything about the city around him at all, can barely think over how much he _feels_.

This isn't happening. This isn't supposed to _happen_. He's supposed to marry Kurt, they're supposed to be happy, they're supposed to be _together_. But in 3 words, Kurt had taken their reality and shattered it into a million pieces, irreparable.

_Maybe I don't._

He'd felt like he couldn't breathe, still feels like he can't breathe, his heart and lungs and _everything_ ripped out of him by one short and simple sentence, but everything is so far from simple now.

How could Kurt do this to him, to _them_?

He's not sure how he got here, doesn't remember making the decision to come here, his legs must have carried him on instinct and muscle memory alone to his best friend's apartment because he finds himself now reaching out to press the button next to Sam's name.

A moment later, Sam's voice is crackling through the old speaker. "Yeah?"

Words escape him in the moment, a soundless breath passing his lips as the voice on the other end pulls him from his whirlwind of thought just a bit.

"Hello?" Sam's voice asks again.

"It's me," Blaine says, voice low and weak and empty.

"Blaine?" Sam asks, and if Blaine were paying closer attention he would hear the concern seeping into his voice.

"Yeah," he responds simply, wrapping his arms around himself because now he's cold, realizes he's soaked, wonders absently how long he spent wandering in the pouring rain before he ended up here.

"I'll buzz you in, come on up," Sam says quickly, and then the speaker cuts out.

The door buzzes, and Blaine reaches out automatically to pull it open and make his way up to Sam's apartment.

* * *

He tried calling Blaine after he left, but his fiancé – _ex_ -fiancé, he reminds himself, this was _his decision_ – didn't pick up.

He hadn't really expected Blaine to answer his calls, wasn't really sure what to say if he _had_ , anyway.

What else is there to say?

He hadn't planned this, but now that it's done, it feels… right.

It hurts like hell, of course it does, he's heartbroken. And he never wanted to break Blaine's heart like this, either, he _loves_ Blaine, but… that's why this is the right decision. He loves Blaine, he doesn't want to _hate_ Blaine, and he knows himself well enough to know that was coming if he didn't end things.

But that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. Doesn't mean that knowing he's no longer Blaine's, knowing Blaine is no longer _his_ , doesn't feel like a knife straight to his heart, sharp and piercing and acute. He was hurting before but it was dull and subdued and, most of the time, he could ignore it. But now it's a fresh wound, jagged and raw and all-consuming.

His phone rings on the table, the happy tune a jarring contrast to the swirl of emotion drowning him, and he's pulled back to the surface, his heart catching in his throat as he has one thought – _Blaine_.

It's not Blaine, though. It's his dad.

He considers letting the call go to voicemail. The second he opens his mouth his father will know something is wrong, and Kurt has barely processed this yet, doesn't know what to tell his father when he inevitably asks, "What's wrong?" But it's Thursday evening, and they have this call _every_ Thursday evening. If Kurt doesn't answer, Burt will worry, and he doesn't want that, either. He'll have to tell his father eventually anyway; he might as well get it over with now.

He picks up the phone and accepts the call.

* * *

He's so thankful Sam agreed to help.

They'd been up most of the night, Blaine alternating between uncontrollable sobs and blank stares at the wall, barely speaking except to say "I can't believe it," and "How could he do this," and "I _love_ him."

They'd decided it was best to get his things from the loft right away. Get it over and done with so he can try to move on – not that he has any clue where to _start_ that process, he's never been good at moving on – without having to worry about any logistics.

"At least you didn't get married yet," Sam had said.

That only made Blaine cry harder.

He'd thought being in the loft would be harder, but he mostly feels empty. He supposes it just hasn't sunk in yet, and he's glad for that, because he only has so much time before Kurt gets home from class and he wants to be gone before then.

Being here is one thing. Seeing Kurt again – here, in this place they lived in together, this space they shared, that was _theirs_ , another reminder of what they no longer have – is entirely different.

He's in the bathroom collecting his toiletries when he hears Sam's voice.

"Oh, hey."

"Hi, Sam," Kurt's voice responds.

Blaine freezes. They were supposed to have another half hour at least, why is Kurt here _now_?

"Blaine said you wouldn't be back until 2:30," Sam says awkwardly.

"My class ended early," Kurt responds, then after a pause that's just _slightly_ too long, "is… is he here?"

He wants Sam to say no, wants Kurt to turn around and leave the apartment so he doesn't have to see him or _speak_ to him, but he knows that isn't realistic.

"Uh…," Sam stammers, then continues, "yeah, he was just getting his stuff in the bathroom."

Kurt doesn't reply, but Blaine can hear the click of his steps coming closer, and he busies himself with _looking_ busy as he shuffles things around on a shelf, back to the door.

The footsteps stop, and Blaine can feel Kurt standing in the doorway, eyes on him. "Hi, Blaine."

Blaine knows Kurt well enough to hear the pain in his voice, and that just makes it worse because this was Kurt's decision, Kurt did this to them, _Kurt has no right to feel hurt_.

He stops shuffling the bottles on the shelf and turns, meeting Kurt's eyes. "Hi."

"I called," Kurt says simply.

"I know."

"I'm sorry."

Blaine stares at him for a long moment, not quite sure how to respond to that. It's not that he thinks Kurt doesn't _mean_ it, because he knows he does. But this isn't an "I want to take it back" apology, this is an "I'm sorry it had to be this way" apology. And this is not something he's ready to even think about forgiving.

In the end he opts for silence, peels his eyes away from Kurt and turns back to the shelf, slowly continuing to sort through the contents of the bathroom they used to share, picking out the things belonging to him and trying not to linger on the things that don't. Eventually he hears Kurt's soft sigh, hears the footsteps as he walks back out into the open area of the loft, talks quietly to Sam for a moment, and then slips back out the front door to leave Blaine and Sam to the task at hand.

Small mercies, he supposes.

* * *

Kurt lays alone in bed, on his usual side because it's what he's used to, because being on Blaine's side feels wrong, because if he lays with his back to the Blaine's side he can pretend that Blaine is there, sleeping soundly and not in some other bed in some other apartment in the city. He assumes Blaine is with Sam, but he can't be sure, and Blaine has made it crystal clear he has no interest in talking.

Not that Kurt can blame him. This was Kurt's decision, and he needs to learn to live with the fallout. And if the fallout is Blaine hating him, well… that's better than growing to hate Blaine, so he'll take it.

It wasn't a mistake. He knows they weren't working out, it _wasn't_ a mistake.

So why does it _hurt_ so much?

 _It's for the best_ he reminds himself as the tears he hasn't yet let himself cry finally come, streaking across his cheeks wet and salty as it sinks in, _really_ sinks in, that he's alone now.

He pulls the blankets tighter around his shoulders, pulls his knees up toward his chest, makes himself small as he curls into himself, so small and alone in this big bed he was never meant to be alone in.

It's for the best.


End file.
